Wonderful
by Julbie
Summary: Halfrek grants Buffy's inadvertent wish and now Buffy gets to see what life would be like if she never came back from the dead.


Buffy, calm down--  
  
I will not calm down. Buffy and Willow sat at a table in the middle of The Bronze. Their voices were hushed but filled with tension. I've had it with this. Every time this guilty depression of yours comes on you start hinting around like it's all my fault. Like if I hadn't been so insensitive by DYING you wouldn't have had to bring me back and gotten yourself so deep in the magiks. Well it's not my fault you killed Warren the way you did, so don't even try to foist that one off on me.  
  
Willow's brow wrinkled. Buffy, GOD! That's not what I'm saying at all! I can't believe you think that. I just meant that bringing you back was the beginning of... all the bad stuff.   
  
Buffy gestured as though her point was just illustrated and Willow squeezed her eyes shut. That was dumb. I mean... I didn't mean it like THAT... Look, I am NOT blaming you. I know it's my own fault, that spell was really dense. I should have shared some of the heavier stuff with the others. But I thought I could do it alone. I was cocky. I should have been more... careful... or...  
  
You shouldn't have done it at all! Even Buffy seemed startled at her own outburst. A few nearby Bronzians turned a bit and tried to pretend they weren't listening.   
  
Willow leaned in and spoke softy. Buffy what are you saying?   
  
Buffy didn't respond or meet Willow's eyes, so Willow continued. I thought you were over this. Have you... are you feeling unhappy again?  
  
Well, if I was, it sure wouldn't make me a stand out in our little group, spat the very frustrated Buffy. She was tired of having this same fight with Willow again and again. She knew she was speaking rashly, but something had to give. The only thing that's making me unhappy is living with the guilt that my best friend became a junkie because of me.   
  
You know that's not--  
  
Buffy cut Willow off with an angry groan. UGH! Sometimes I just wish you'd never brought me back.  
  
A female patron from the bronze suddenly turned completely around to face them, revealing a face covered with deep, red grooves.   
  
It was Halfrek. Wish granted.  
  
As Buffy asked the question, the Bronze started to change slightly. People shifted positions, leaving blurred trails of color behind. Willow disappeared entirely in a swirl of color and light. The same band played on, however, and they never missed a beat.  
  
Halfrek, now in human face, chirped and clapped her hands together.  
  
Buffy just stared. What are you talking about?  
  
You're wish. To not be brought back from the dead. Try and keep up, sweetie. Halfrek patted Buffy's cheek.  
  
I wasn't talking to you! Buffy looked over at the empty seat that was full of Willow just moments ago. Slowly, realization hit and Buffy looked around, eyes wide and wet. What did you do?  
  
Halfrek read Buffy's unhappy expression and gasped at her lack of etiquette. Talk about ungrateful! Hey listen, if you're unhappy with the service I'll accept that. But you don't go throwing words like wish' around without expecting to be taken up on it. Now suck it up!  
  
I'm dead?  
  
In this reality, yes.   
  
Buffy looked down at herself. Why am I still here then?   
  
Well, it's your wish. You tell me. Halfrek giggled to herself and dabbed at her teary eyes dramatically. Honestly, you mortals never know what you want. Personally, I think you don't want to be dead. You just want to know what'd it be like around here if you had never come back. She leaned in close, a cheerful conspirator. You're curious aren'tcha? I don't blame you. It's kind of like starring in your own private It's a Wonderful Life.' When Buffy did not respond, Halfrek sighed. She was growing bored with Buffy's slow acceptance of her prize. She began to examine her own nail tips for imperfections. So do you want this or not?   
  
This snapped Buffy out of it. I have a choice?  
  
Halfrek rolled her eyes. Of course! What, do you think I'm some ogre? People never get this. I'm here to grant YOUR wish. You can change it now or check this reality out for a while. You know, try it on. Give me your decision later. If you don't like this, there's a whole crapload of other realities out there just waiting to be flipped through.  
  
Buffy was hypnotized by Halfrek's lightning fast delivery. She reminded Buffy of a salesperson. They did all the talking and you ended up with something you didn't want. Buffy had the distinct feeling that's what was happening now. I thought you only helped children.  
  
Halfrek waved that off with a laugh. Oh, that's just a bit of nonsense from Anya's little rumor mill. She's so jealous. I help whoever is in need. I have to. I work on commission. Speaking of that, I gotta run. Just give me a jingle when you're ready.  
  
With a swoop of the arm, Halfrek was gone. Buffy stared at the empty air that Halfrek used to occupy.   
  
The only response was a blank stare from a bemohawked gentleman who thought she was talking to him.  
  
Buffy shook her head then got up to walk around the Bronze. She didn't get far when something made her stop cold. It was Tara. Alive and well and sitting at a table with Willow and Anya. They were all laughing. They were all happy.   
  
She approached the table slowly and waited for them to see her. She couldn't stop marveling at the beautiful fact of Tara. It made sense that she was alive in this reality, seeing as how Warren had nothing at all against her. It still hit hard though. Buffy shook it off and sat down in a nearby chair. She made a few throat clearing noises, trying to be conspicuous. No one even looked in her direction.   
  
What about a washer/dryer? Anya blurted with excitement.  
  
The witches looked at her with half-smiles, trying to be polite. Tara spoke first, delicately. Um... that's kind of nice, but Dawn already has a washer/dryer in the house. It's in our laundry room. Also, I don't think that's something every sixteen year old girl has on her birthday wish list.  
  
Okay. Dawn's alive and well. That's of the good. I'd almost forgotten about her birthday, though.   
  
Anya frowned. Well, whenever I buy presents I think of what I would buy for me. And that's what I want, so I can stop going to the laundromat and fraternizing with the dregs of humanity.  
  
Willow took over, less delicately, Let's try to find Dawn something that's more about what she wants. That is the tradition.   
  
I know. I know. But you shouldn't judge. You've never had to borrow detergent from a shirtless man with the name peggy' tattooed above his nipple! Anya crossed her arms and sulked. The witches looked at each other and giggled. Buffy giggled too. Some things never changed.  
  
I wonder if... Buffy didn't even get to finish the thought because Spike and Xander were barreling towards her looking very serious and determined. It took her a moment to realize that they were headed for the chair she sat in and did not even see her. Buffy jumped out of the chair just as Spike hopped into it with a very satisfied look on his face.   
  
Xander yelled.  
  
God, you're slow! Spike laughed. You're gettin' old, that's what it is. Old and rickety.  
  
Xander squinted at him and laughed bitterly. Spike laughed back, mocking. The three girls just rolled their eyes, but Buffy was transfixed. Xander stopped laughing abruptly and plopped down on the arm of the chair, violating Spike's personal space.   
  
Piss off, you bloody pouf. Spike tried shoving him off but Xander wouldn't budge.   
  
No thank you. Grinning, Xander started to barely poke at Spike's ear with his index finger. Spike shook him of a couple of times and then finally slapped him away, hard.  
  
Quit it! ... OW! Spike winced at the shooting pain in his head.  
  
Xander sighed, very satisfied. That chip is just the greatest toy in the world.  
  
Spike looked menacingly up at him. And if I ever get it out, you'd better run.  
  
Ooooh, scary! I think I just peed. Wait, lemme check. He lifted his leg just about over Spike's head. Spike couldn't hold in his laughter anymore.  
  
Stupid ass. He pushed again. Go away.  
  
Oh, all right. Xander stumbled to his feet and found another, less desirable chair to park in.   
  
So... hi. Tara smiled at them, amused by their antics.   
  
Anya was annoyed. Yes, hello. We're here also.  
  
And looking gorgeous, as usual! Xander smiled and leaned over to give her a placating kiss. Anya beamed at him.   
  
Hello Mr. Harris.  
  
Hello, Mrs. Harris.  
  
  
  
You have something to say, Spike? Anya looked at him, challenging.  
  
Spike twisted in his seat, a scowl on his face. It's been three months. When's the sodding novelty gonna wear off?  
  
Xander looked at Anya and rolled his eyes. Spike had very little tolerance for romantic love these days. It was understandable, but Xander refused to let him wallow in self pity. You're just mad cause you haven't had a date since old Harmony shot you in the back with a crossbow dart!  
  
Spike had no argument, so he just said, Oh... bite me.  
  
Willow laughed and shook her head. Can I ask about patrolling now or are we still doing scenes from a buddy movie?  
  
It was uneventful.   
  
Disappointing as hell, more like, Spike muttered.   
  
Xander slapped Spike on the knee. Spike's just mad he had to be the sidekick tonight. I dusted two vamps while he stood around holding his... stake.  
  
Oh you lying bastard! I handed them to you! Spike pushed at Xander's leg with his boot.  
  
Hey, it's okay man. It's nothing to be ashamed of. You're among friends. Xander giggled.   
  
Spike looked like he might bust a vein, but calmed down when he saw the silly look on Xander's face. Riiight. Whatever gets you through the night, Harris. He turned to the girls. But I think we all know who the top scoob around here is, don't we girls?  
  
The girls took a moment to consider.   
  
Anya shrugged.  
Tara concurred.  
Xander joined.  
Spike nodded accordingly, then started to laugh. Willow. Exactly.  
  
You guys! Willow waved them away, shyness creeping in.  
  
Come on Will, take the compliment, Xander nudged. You're a tough but fair leader who also happens to be little ball of sunshine.  
  
With your own... ball of sunshine, Spike assisted.  
  
Oh nice! Xander put up a hand for a high five with Spike.   
  
Spike only looked back at him. Stop it.  
  
Xander put his hand down, remembering that Spike doesn't high five. He could respect that.  
  
Buffy watched all this with increasing dismay. What the hell? Tara being alive I'll accept. Anya and Xander being married, Willow being the leader of the group... whatever... but Xander and Spike are pals?! This is just... wrong! Okay, what the hell is going on? Buffy blurted out to the surprise of... no one, because they still couldn't hear her. Halfrek? Hello? Genie? Rub, rub, rub! I have a few questions!  
  
said a voice from very nearby. Buffy whirled around to find Halfrek standing directly behind her.  
  
What the hell is this? Buffy demanded. I'm dead and everyone is much happier? What kind of wish fulfillment is that?  
  
Halfrek was quiet a moment. She rubbed her forehead in thought, then looked at Buffy. This always happens. Okay, here's the thing... you didn't wish that the world would suck if you never came back from the dead. You only wished that you never came back. I can't control what happens in these realities, I can just show them to you.  
  
Buffy started to protest but realized Halfrek spoke the truth. She nodded, dolefully.   
  
Oh, don't be sad, Halfrek pleaded. I can't stand it when my clients are sad. Are you ready to move on? Perhaps something in a different setting? It doesn't have to be Sunnydale. You could wish to be a movie star. Would that make you happy?  
  
Buffy watched the smiling faces of her friends. She watched as Tara balled up a napkin and threw it at Spike who ducked and laughed. She watched as Anya and Xander stole another kiss. She watched Willow watching Tara with love shining in her eyes. It would make me happy if...  
  
Halfrek was getting bored again.  
  
...could I stay here a while longer?   
  
Sure, anything you want. Just beckon when you've had enough... but knock off that Genie stuff, I hate that. Before Buffy could even respond, Halfrek was gone.  
  
***  
  
The sun was just about set, leaving the sky with a pinkish glow. Dawn sat on the counter in the kitchen, talking on the phone. I know. Yeah, he'll be up in a minute. It'll be fine. No, I'll come to your house. Okay, bye.   
  
Spike emerged from the basement and shuffled groggily into the kitchen, bare-footed and untucked.   
  
Mornin' bit.   
  
Evenin' Spike.  
  
Spike opened the fridge and pulled out a bag of blood and a carton of milk. He then got himself a bowl and a box of instant oatmeal from the cabinet. Dawn grimaced. She'd never get used to Spike's disgusting eating habits.   
  
Spike finally got his eyes open enough to get a look at her. What are you all dressed up for?   
  
Well... that's the thing--  
  
Oh, no. Spike set the bowl down. There's a thing?  
  
It's not a big thing. Dawn smiled and raised her eyebrows, trying to look as innocent and childlike as possible. That always worked on Spike. It's actually quite small. Tiny, in fact.  
  
Uh huh. Spike knew where this was leading. And how much does it cost?  
  
Twenty dollars, Dawn said, wincing.  
  
Dawn, what happened to your allowance? He was definitely not going to cave. Not today. No more. Caving was right out!  
  
I had to use it for school. Dawn came over and started to make Spike's breakfast for him. She defended her case as she poured. We had a field trip to the Griffith Park Observatory and the fee was like seventy-five bucks!  
  
Seventy-five dollars! Spike was outraged. I'm telling you, that school is running a racket. I know it. Always with a hand out, they are. Buy my candy, buy my tickets, pay seventy-five dollars for a bus ride to Los Angeles. It's a bloody scandal is what it is!   
  
Dawn hid a smile. Unguarded Spike always showed signs of the British upper cruster he used to be. Stuff just costs more these days, Spike. Dawn shrugged and began to open his blood packet to pour over the oatmeal.   
  
Let me do that. I know it makes you queasy. Spike bit open the packet, poured, mixed and put the bowl in the microwave. Look, I'll tell Giles you need more every month, but he'll probably accuse me of dipping into the till myself.  
  
No. Don't. It's okay... I was just gonna go to the movies with Janice tonight, but we can go next month. It's no big. I don't even like Josh Hartnet anymore. I'm all... whatever with that guy. Dawn laughed it off, but it was clear she was disappointed  
  
Spike totally caved. All right, knock it off. Here. He pulled out his wallet and handed her thirty dollars. Make it last! I'm probably getting fired soon!   
  
Dawn took the money and threw her arms around Spike! You're the best! Thank you SO MUCH!   
  
Spike couldn't help feeling a little great. He hugged Dawn back with a warm smile on his face. Just be careful.  
  
Dawn pulled away and rolled her eyes. I'll try not to fall into the popcorn machine!  
  
I'm serious, Spike admonished. After the movie, don't wait for Janice's mom outside. Stay in the lobby of the theater and stay close to people.  
  
Okay, okay! Dawn sighed. You gave me money so I'm humoring you. But you do realize that the papers that say your my older brother and legal guardian are FAKE right?   
  
Spike pointed at her. As far as you're concerned those papers are one hundred percent fact and you are BOUND BY LAW to obey me! Now get out of here before I come to my senses and lock you in your room till you're eighteen!  
  
Dawn smiled, waved and bounced out the door. Spike watched her go then put his head down, still smiling. Buffy walked up to him, so close that he stirred a bit, as if he felt her presence. Buffy was in a total state of shock. Had she not just witnessed what had happened there tonight, she would never have believed it.  
  
Why are you doing this? She whispered.  
  
I'm keeping my promise.  
  
Buffy jumped back. Had he heard her?   
  
No response. Spike took his heated bowl out of the microwave and sat down at the table. He continued to talk to the empty room. I just hope I'm doing a good enough job.   
  
Buffy sat down next to him. He was just about to take a bite of bloody oatmeal when he stopped, spoon halfway to his mouth.  
  
I'm fine. He said aloud, to no one. Buffy was confused. And stop talking in my head around the house. I can't stand it.  
  
Willow stepped into the kitchen wearing a bathrobe. Her hair was wet from the shower. It's just more efficient this way.  
  
Yeah, well... I'm old fashioned. I prefer to open my mouth when I speak.   
  
You seem pretty not fine. What's the matter?   
  
Spike shifted in his seat, struggling with whether or not to say what was on his mind. He made his decision. I shouldn't be her guardian. It's just too bizarre.   
  
Willow rolled her eyes. She figured this was coming sooner or later.   
  
Spike continued. If you were gonna do a little hocus pocus to make things seem legal, why couldn't you have made Xander her brother? Or you her sister, for that matter. Why me? Why am I the bloody wet nurse?  
  
Willow sat down next to him. We talked about this before, Spike. You were the only one that her friends and teachers had never met before. You're the perfect casting choice for 'brother from out of town!' Plus, she trusts you more than us. It took some getting used to at first, but you surprised us all. You're really good with her.  
  
Spike ignores the compliment. I can't even support her. We've got Big Daddy Giles funneling money in from England. And I can't go to the daytime school events because of my sun allergy.' They have to know something's off. You can't put the whammy on everyone. Sooner or later, someone's going to figure it out.  
  
Ahh, but you underestimate my power--  
  
I'm serious, Willow! Spike was really starting to get agitated. He was clearly storing all of this up for quite a while. I just think... I'm not the right...  
  
Willow put a calming hand on his shoulder. Hey. Look at me.  
  
Spike did, reluctantly.   
  
You love her don't you?  
  
Spike flicked his eyes away and nodded almost imperceptibly.  
  
That's all she needs.   
  
Spike looked at Willow who smiled back at him. She put her arm around him and gave him a reassuring shake. Spike reached up and put a hand over hers.  
  
Watching all this with tears streaming down her face, was a totally overwhelmed Buffy.   
  
Willow kissed Spike on the cheek and Spike finally smiled. Now... I have to go dry my hair and you have to eat that... glopy stuff.   
  
Spike looked at the clock. Bloody hell, it's late. I've got to get to work. He stood up with his bowl and ate five spoonfuls on the way to the sink where he dumped the rest down the garbage disposal.  
  
Buffy was just drying her eyes when she thought she heard Spike say he was going to work. She looked up in surprise.   
  
***  
Buffy followed Spike all the way to the edge of town where he entered one of the seediest bars she'd ever seen. It didn't even have a name, just a big, broken neon sign that said "Bar."  
  
Buffy took a seat at an empty stool in the corner and watched in amazement for most of the night as Spike bar tended like a pro. The clientele was mostly demon and vampire. Maybe a human or two in the mix. All of them disreputable.   
  
A couple of tough-looking demons cackled loudly at one end of the bar. Spike eyed them warily. One of them slammed a glass down on the bar and slid it. Spike's hand shot out to stop it just before it careened off the end of the bar and shattered.   
  
"Nice save, Blondie."  
  
Spike ignored this and began to refill the glass. Somehow his quiet demeanor put him on the toughie demon's radar.  
  
"Hey."   
  
Spike ignored.  
  
"HEY! You! Barkeep!"  
  
Great. This couldn't be good. Spike sighed heavily then turned to Toughie Demon. "Yeah?"  
  
"Ain't you that vampire?"  
  
"Yes. I am a vampire."  
  
Leaving Toughie with a nonplused look on his face, Spike turned back to the task at hand. He calmly finished making the drink, then turned around again and set it in front of the demon. "Four Seventy-Five."   
  
Toughie threw a five dollar bill on the bar. When Spike went to take it, the demon slammed his hand over Spike's.  
  
"I knew I seen you before. You help the Slayer, don'tcha?"  
  
Another drunken demon, one that looked remarkably like Steve Buschemi, piped up. "No, I told you. The slayer's dead. Her little friends are trying to make everyone think she's still alive. But I heard rumors--"  
  
Toughie Demon cut Buschemi off. "Horseshit. That were true this place'd be a hell of a lot more fun than it is now. Rumors ain't nothin' but rumors. If the slayer's dead, I'll shave my hairy blue ass."  
  
He returned his attention to Spike who had since jerked his hand away. "She ain't dead, is she, Blondie? She's your little friend, you'd be the one to know."  
  
"You got me wrong, friend. If that bitch were dead, you think I'd waste my time slinging turpentine for the likes of you? Little bint gets in the way of all my endeavors. Bugs the piss out of me, but what can I do? Just have to keep coming up with new and exciting ways to kill her is all."  
  
The Toughie Demon studied Spike for a long time. Then, "Yeah, yeah. I hear ya, man. One day she'll get what's coming."  
  
Suddenly, the Big bad emerged. "Right. Let's hope I'm the one giving it to her."  
  
Toughie seemed sufficiently creeped out by Spike's murderous double entendre. He raised his glass and drank to him.   
  
Spike nodded, then turned around and began to organize the bottles behind the bar. Buffy noticed that his hands were shaking. He knocked over a bottle. It smashed to the ground. "Bugger!"   
  
Not wanting the demon gang to see his nervousness, Spike called the other bartender over. "I've got to see a man about a snake. I'll clean that up when I get back." He b-lined it for the bathroom.   
  
Once inside, he broke down, sobs shaking his whole body. He had to bad mouth the slayer at least once a night and it was really taking it's toll on him.   
  
At the bar, Buffy overheard a conversation between the other bartender, Gina, a vampire, and the demon gang.   
  
"He's lying about knowing the slayer," Gina whispered, her eye on the bathroom door. "I saw him with that little witch bitch friend of hers not too long ago. She came in here and he tried to act like he didn't know her. Then he slipped her a note on a napkin and she left real fast. He thinks I'm stupid. Dirty spy is what he is. He listens to people talking, finds out what they're up to, then reports back to his little gang. It's disgusting. I can't wait till you kill him."  
  
Steve Buschemi's eyes bugged out. "Us? Wait a minute! How did we get this job?"  
  
"What the hell are you, some kind of weasel? Where's your guts?" Toughie Demon sneered at him.  
  
"I've got plenty of guts, but we're talking about Spike here! William the frickin' Bloody! That ain't no joke!"   
  
Another demon thought he might be helpful. "He can't kill all of us at the same time!"   
  
"Obviously you haven't done the required reading."   
  
"No, he's different now." Gina whispered. "He's all quiet and genteel. The slayer really castrated him, poor bastard. You'll just be putting him out of his misery."  
  
"Well, why don't you do it, you think it's so easy?" Buschemi was really starting to freak. The others had to shush him.  
  
"I can't kill another vampire!" Gina was appalled. "That'd make me just as bad as him! No, you guys should definitely do it. Tonight. Free drinks for a month if you do."   
  
"Hell, I'm in." Toughie Demon drunkenly exclaimed.   
  
The bathroom door opened and everyone scattered as though they hadn't been talking, which seemed very unnatural given the bar atmosphere. Spike sensed something was wrong, but didn't much care.   
  
Buffy did. She had never felt more helpless in her entire life. She watched as Spike went behind the bar and bent to clean up the broken glass. He looked like he'd been crying. Her heart broke for him. She got up and hopped over the bar, trying to get as close to him as possible so he might feel her presence again. "Spike! Spike can you hear me or... feel me or whatever?"   
  
She looked over at the Toughie Demon and at Buschemi who was biting his nails. They were watching Spike very closely.   
  
"They're going to kill you! Please! Spike! You have to get out of here."   
  
Spike stood up and she stood up with him. He walked through her to the other side of the bar toward the trash. She gasped. It was the most unbelievable sensation she'd ever felt. Cold and hot at the same time. It took her a moment to catch her breath. Spike stopped and turned around. He'd felt something. He looked directly into Buffy's eyes but didn't see her.   
  
"Spike! It's me!! I'm right here! Listen to me, you have to leave! Right now! They're gonna--"  
  
Another sensation, much more unpleasant, almost painful, like getting shocked. Gina had stepped into her, was standing right in her space, actually. "Spike, it's a pretty slow night--"  
  
Buffy quickly jumped out of the way, panting for breath.   
  
"--I'm not gonna need you to close after all. Besides, you look kinda sick. You should go feed and get some sleep." Gina snuck a glance toward the demon gang. This was it. She was giving them their chance for glory.   
  
Spike was oblivious, and actually relieved. "Yeah. Okay. I think I'll take you up on that. Thanks. I'll see you tomorrow night."   
  
"Yeah... okay." Gina turned away before he could see her smirking.   
  
Spike tossed the glass in the trash can, folded his bar towel and headed for the door.   
  
Buffy composed herself when she saw the gang of at least six demons standing to follow. "No!"  
  
She tried to go after them but she ran into, or rather through Gina again. It knocked the wind out of her. She doubled over, gasping for breath. Moving around from behind the bar, she tried to stay on her feet. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw another large demon moving towards her. She tried to move away, but didn't quite make it. This time the feeling hit her like a sledge hammer. She felt like throwing up. She dropped to her knees crawled along the floor, only to be walked through by two or three people who heard a fight going on outside and decided to have a look. She was sure if she wasn't already dead, this would have killed her.   
  
From her fetal position on the ground, she heard loud voices and snarling. "Watch out, he's behind you!"   
  
"I'll show you who's a bad ass you slayer whipped piece of shi--!"   
  
Slam! Crack!  
  
"No!" Buffy weakly cried. She looked up at the small diamond plexiglass window and could only see the night sky and the top of the building across the street.   
  
Suddenly, someone came bursting through the door. Buffy rolled out of the way and narrowly missed another "encounter." It was the Steve Buschemi demon, bleeding freely from his neck, his eyes glazed over. "He killed me!" was all he said, before slumping over the bar. Gina looked disgusted, and more than a little worried.  
  
Buffy smiled a little. Spike isn't going out that easily. She struggled to get to her feet, careful to stay out of ever one's way. Suddenly she remembered something. "Halfrek!" Her voice was weak. She felt like she'd been hit by a truck. "Halfrek, please!"  
  
"Yello!" Halfrek appeared looking all glammed up, a complete contrast to Buffy's sickly appearance.   
  
"Make it stop!"  
  
"What?"   
  
"Turn it back. Turn it around. I want it the way it was."   
  
"What's the matter with you?"   
  
"People walked through me. You forgot to warn me about it."   
  
"Oh, right. Well, I didn't think you'd be socializing with nothing but malcontents. The more evil a being is the more it hurts." Halfrek looked around the bar with an air of extreme distaste. "You sure know how to live it up."   
  
More frightening fight sounds from outside. Bones breaking, glass smashing, lots of yelling.   
  
"Look, we don't have time. They're going to kill him."  
  
"Who?"   
  
"Spike."  
  
"Oh." The look on Halfrek's face puzzled Buffy. She seemed... concerned. "I can't."  
  
"What?"  
  
"I can't make it like it was. I can give you something else, but I can't make it like it was. Especially not if he dies."   
  
Buffy's heart went cold. She knew there was a catch somewhere.   
  
"You told me I could change it."   
  
"You can." Halfrek seemed more serious than Buffy had ever seen her. "But you can't change it BACK. You have to pick another reality. A different one."   
  
Buffy couldn't think. She didn't know what to ask for because she was afraid of picking the wrong thing and making it worse. Suddenly, she heard Spike's trademark cry of extreme pain. She found the strength to go to the door and burst outside. What she saw nearly made Buffy drop to her knees again. The ground was littered with dead or bleeding demons. Spike was covered in blood, in vamp face and fighting Toughie Demon with only one arm. The other had obviously been very badly broken.   
  
Halfrek followed her out and Buffy could hear her gasp at the sight of Spike. She even thought she heard Halfrek call him William again.   
  
"Halfrek! You have to help me."   
  
They watched as Toughie Demon laughed and put his foot through a wooden crate sitting by the curb as trash. He bent down and came up with a very lethal looking stake.  
  
Buffy turned to Halfrek, desperate. "I don't know what you know about Spike, but you must know he doesn't deserve this. Especially not over me! Please! I don't need everything to be exactly like it was before... just change this!!"  
  
She turned back around to see Toughie lunging at an exhausted Spike. The stake was about to make contact and Spike was just going to let it happen. He'd had enough.  
  
...then suddenly the world changed.  
  
Buffy looked around her, the sky seemed to close in on her and become a ceiling. A gray, stone ceiling. The pain and weariness began to leave her body she felt herself sitting on a hard surface. The bloodied version of Spike in front of her began to change, as well. His cuts and bruises cleared up, the blood disappeared, his arm seemed to repair itself and his face slowly melted into it's human form. All the demons, dead and alive, the bar, the street outside, everything went away. Only Spike remained, and he was looking directly at her. "...dozens of times, lots of different ways," he was saying to her. "Every night I save you."  
  
It took Buffy a minute to realize where she was. Spike waited for her response, nervously. There was a long stretch of silence, then Buffy remembered. Halfrek had sent her back to that first night after Willow resurrected her from the grave. She would have to go through all of that pain again.   
  
Or maybe this was her second chance.   
  
She looked up at Spike and he looked away. "I'm sorry. I don't know why I talk so bloody much."  
  
Buffy still didn't respond and Spike was growing increasingly uncomfortable. She watched him fidget and remembered everything he did and said in the past twenty-four hours. None of it had happened, really. And she wondered if anything close to it ever would. She was alive. And apparently her mere presence brought out the worst in people, especially in Spike. That would be a problem.   
  
Unless, of course, she did something to change it.   
  
She stood up, slowly, and began to walk toward Spike. He was afraid to move and could only watch her as she got closer and closer. Suddenly she raised her hands to him and he instinctively flinched. She smiled softly and put her arms around his neck, pulling him into a gentle hug.   
  
Spike had no idea what to do. His eyes were wide and wet. He couldn't figure out what was happening. Just as he was about to put his arms around her, she pulled away and looked into his eyes. "Thank you," she whispered.   
  
She had to laugh. Spike was completely baffled. She reached up and touched his face. "Everything's gonna be okay now." Her hand slid down his not-broken arm and she took his hand in hers. He finally exhaled when she squeezed his hand and started to tug him toward the door. "Come on. I'm calling a late-night scoobie meeting. We've got a lot of stuff to talk about." Spike stood up but could not stop staring at her face.   
  
She smiled at him and sighed, then tiptoed up and kissed him, softly, on the lips. "A LOT to talk about." She turned and began leading Spike to the door. "Come on." He followed, with a slow smile spreading across his face.   
  
The End


End file.
